Man Lessons Learned | Zombieland Survival Rules

Zombieland Rules CartoonThe Zombie genre has had its own resurgence in the last few years but it never really took off for me. I’m not into all the gore and action scenes alone. I need some storyline and character study to watch it. So while everyone was watching Dawn of the Dead and 28 Days Later I just couldn’t get into it. That all changed for me with Zombieland and The Walking Dead.

Why though? I even asked myself why I suddenly found these two interesting. After processing this thought and digesting it I realized that these 2 had one common ground – Lessons to be learned for every man. This is right up my alley. While Zombieland is more comical and The Walking Dead an overlying serious tone they both share life altering events (survivalists) where a decision has to be made on the spot. There’s no room for quivering, indecision, fear and ignorance. It leaves us wondering, “What would I do if I were in their shoes?”

There are 32 total Zombieland survival rules. Some apply, which are the ones I’ll be going over, and some don’t.

Zombieland Survival Rules

#1 Cardio

Why is cardio so important for men? Look around you. I think fitness has a direct relation to how capable and effectively we are in life and can care for our families. Who’s pulling the weight? You or someone else?

#2 Double Tap

Knowing how to shoot a gun and effectively pulling off the Double Tap like a man is important. In all areas of life be confident and be effective. Make sure what you’re doing is done right and thorough. Learn how if you need to. “I don’t know” does not apply here.

#4 Seatbelts

It might seem “manly” and brave to dare a crash with no seatbelt. It’s also called stupidity. Unless you’re able to control every event and other drivers on the road, the best preparation is precaution. Wear a seatbelt and have your loved ones wear one too.

#7 Travel Light

All those “collectibles” are most likely just junk. If you need help discerning the difference ask a friend. And when traveling save your hands for carrying your women and/or family’s bags.

#8 Get a Kickass Partner

Her beauty will attract you and this might sound cliché but that beauty will fade. Get to know her. Learn about her. The real her is also what’s inside and it is this that you will share your life with.

For other relationships like friends and work make sure you get to know them before handing them the keys to your life. Be wise in who you trust but not fearful of allowing yourself and others to get to know each other.

It is by chance we met, by choice we became friends.

#17 Don’t Be A Hero

When this rule first came up in the movie and it was “Don’t be a Hero” my reaction was “Come on, Man Up! Which he does step up to do later in the movie. What I liked about this is that it reminded me of my own personal journey from being a boy to manhood. I had a lot of hot air and thought I was Manning Up all the time. I was ready to be fearless but didn’t know how or have the wisdom behind it. Later in the movie he changes his rule to “Be A Hero”.  He takes all he’s learned from Tallahassee and zombie killing (life experiences) and uses that to save lives. We can do the same!

Like Tallahassee from Zombieland so eloquently put it, “It’s time to nut up or shut up!”.

#18 Limber Up

“You ever see a lion limber up before chasing a gazelle.”~Tallahassee (Click here to watch)

Sometimes you need to “Seize the Day”. Other times know your body and stretch before engaging in physical activities. Tallahassee later in the movie learned this the hard way when he strained his back.

#21 Avoid Strip Clubs

Don’t cheat yourself with easy, fake and shallow replacements for friendship, intimacy and relationships. Be a Man and ask a girl out and pursue her.

#22 When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out

This doesn’t mean being scared and having a back up plan so you don’t have to man up and execute. This means being prepared and anticipating danger (trouble) and having an escape route.

#29 Buddy System

Watch each other’s back. Don’t leave a fallen man behind. This applies to non-heroic situations too. These are the ones that really kill you to do. No one may ever see you in action or know, but still do it.

#32 Enjoy the Little Things

Don’t sweat the small stuff! Keep a glass half full perspective. Life is all about simple pleasures. You might feel like purchasing the fancy new car or big screen TV when you know you’ll enjoy what you have already. Enjoyment is not a competition with yourself or anyone else.

#34 Clean Socks

Think this is self-explanatory? If it was it wouldn’t be on the list. Dirty socks and dirty shoes will clear out a room. Enough said.

#48 Hygiene

Read rule #34 again if you need an explanation of this rule.

While humorous all these rules can be applied to our everyday lives. The point of a list is not to see how many rules we can amass but to be prepared for any situation. Rarely are these events preceded with a warning sign. Split second, in the moment is when who you really are is shown through the decisions you make.

What do you think? Join us in the comments and let us know which of the Zombieland Survival Rules is your favorite?

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  1. What a great movie. I admit that I wasn’t a big fan of other zombie movies before that one. They all just seemed too similar with the only difference being how gory they killed the zombies.

    Now you got me worried about rule #34. I’ve got a date tonight, but my shoes are a little worn out. If I wasn’t so busy this afternoon I’d be running over to the mall to get a new pair. With any luck she won’t mind the shoes and I’ll be well on my way with #8.

  2. It’s funny that you mention the movie and show that were filmed blocks from where I live John. This is why I always shoot zombie targets at the range. You never want to fold under the pressure when a zombie is approaching you at a brisk pace.

    • No way! That’s awesome!!! I just recently got into the show and eagerly anticipating the next season in October. I like the Zombie targets too. Do you get to see them filming and stuff?

  3. I rely on Zombieland, the funniest film ever made, for most of my practical guidance. If you can function in a world taken over by zombies, you can do alright in regular life.

  4. Love that movie. Nothing like a good zombie movie and some good laughs.

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