Fear consumes our energy. Fear leaves us empty. Fear makes us ineffective. Fear is a parasite. Fear is Real.
Sometimes it is so invasive that it feels tangible. And the more it controls us the more real it starts to feel, and we gradually lose control. Do we have to be controlled by these feelings that are constantly trying to invite themselves in? Fear is always looking for an entry way. We are the ones that give it a home in our life. Just to be clear I’m not talking about that healthy fear that works like your conscience trying to keep you safe.
I once heard that darkness is the absence of light. So fear comes from the absence of what? Maybe a lack of confidence? Maybe faith? Maybe from inexperience? Maybe bad experiences? Maybe not trusting God? Maybe trying to control everything? What do you think?
Am I Fearless? I definitely ask myself this question from time to time. I think every man and boy does. Inherently we all want to be called fearless or daring. Call a boy a chicken and it can stick with him for life. As a kid I wanted to be a knight and once I learned – sitting in history class – that they didn’t exist anymore I switched to wanting to be a FBI agent. There’s a reason “No Fear” became a popular tagline across the world. But we all have our fears, and they come in different sizes. Mine is fear of failure and not being someone others can depend on. If I fail at these than I’m not a man (at least that’s my fear). A smaller fear of mine is heights. I didn’t learn how to ride a swing until I was 8 because that “exhilarating rush” scared me. I didn’t trust the structure of the swing to keep me from tumbling away in the wind. My fear restricted me from this simple pleasure. While this latter one isn’t life debilitating, it is still a fear. Some fear eating or going to the movies alone. Right now there is a lot of fear in holding a job, financial security, and the future.
“Imagine your life, wholly untouched by angst. What if faith, not fear, was your default reaction to threats?” Max Lucado
Fear is an emotion that will overcome us if we let it.So how do we not give into this parasitic fear? Do we embrace it? I’m sure we’ve all heard this. I disagree with this statement though. I’m not going to embrace it when I’m trying to rid my life of it. I’m not saying fear isn’t real….we’ve already established that it is. It would actually be unwise to not recognize the power and real existence of fear. Some try to ignore it and that works for a time. Some build up confidence in themselves through knowledge and experience. I did this. But fear will eventually penetrate through any of this. Fear is bigger than us.
We’re introducing fearless and fear as a recurring topic. What are your thoughts on it? How do you deal with it? Do you think fear only affects the weak? Think about it, chew on it, share your thoughts. We look forward to discussing this with you.
Think about who it is that wants us to fear and be afraid? A lot of fears are based on lies or misconstrued truths. And who is the father of lies? It’s Satan. I didn’t get this before. It was easier to say Satan didn’t exist and that I’d overcome my fear. “I’m the master of my fate” was fun to say. Society has marginalized Satan into a little imp with horns and a pitchfork that we can point and laugh at. Who would be afraid of that? He looks weak and smaller than us. We should recognize the danger though, because he’s a master of disguises. He is bigger than us and we need someone bigger to fight for us. To shed light on these lies and help reveal the truth which will ultimately free us. We need the God factor.
God says that he is love and that perfect love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18). We know with confidence that we aren’t in this battle alone. God is a fortress that we can run to and be safe (Psalms 144:2). For myself, I now place my confidence in God. There’s no shame in that. I have full confidence in my strength and abilities, but I also know my limits. I know my fears, and that my knowledge and strength will fail me at some point. They have in the past. I still have to jump in the ring and put on the gloves to do my part. The enemy also knows my fears and will try to exploit them every chance he gets. He wants to knock me down and stomp on me. It took a while but I finally came to the realization that some things, like Satan, are bigger than me. In my own strength I can’t defeat him. God will. Remember the promises he has given us that we can hold on to. Don’t let go. Trust in God. Live the fearless life God wants for you. No fear.
Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Proverbs 3:5,6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.
A quote that I love about Fear….”Fear is not your enemy. It is a compass pointing you to the areas where you need to grow” – Steve Pavlina To me, fear is uncomfortable….but if you can get comfortable being “uncomfortable” then fear has no power over you.
Thanks Stacy. I like that quote.I’ve also found that if I’m afraid of something that it is probably an area I need to grow in. Identifying that fear (the source) and facing it always helps. It definitely is uncomfortable, like going to the gym and getting fit, but afterwards the progress feels great.
That’s a great thought Stacy! Worth expanding on in another article. We plan on doing several series on “Fear” and “Fearlessness” as we haven’t even begun to flesh out what the whole theme of “Fearless Men” is!
I think we need to share this quote on twitter/fb too.
I agree that certain fear’s are healthy and others just need some work to overcome.
The real trick seems to be having the ability/wisdom to know the difference.
For sure! And just like work and the time we put into it….ability and wisdom can come over time if we pursue it. Older = wiser does make sense. Isn’t always true, but I think it definitely can be.
True Dan. I’m already writing our next article on fear. What do you have to say on how to tell the difference between healthy fears and others that we need to overcome?
Well for example in my line of work I have to climb electrical and telephone poles on a daily basis, and although I am not particularly scared of heights, when you fully extend your ladder to 40 feet and 3/4 up your ladder starts flexing or a big gust of wind starts shaking your ladder you freeze up, and then try and tell yourself: ‘its just a few more feet to the top’.
And I believe that fear of falling or those “iffy moments” on the way up help keep me safe by forcing me to go slow, follow procedure, secure the ladder properly, take sure steps, and not get too quick or confidant in what I am doing as that is typically when accidents occur.
Thanks Dan! That’s a very good point. I’m thinking of writing on ‘Fearless or Foolish’ next. Sometimes it’s really tough to tell. Sure a rattle snake is dangerous and we know it. But situations that test our manliness can be tough and aren’t as clear cut.